What Comments Reveal

Denial

Image:  #PicsArt #FreeToEdit


Dear Rude Recent Wannabe-Commenter(s?),

You may be wondering why your comments did not get published, or perhaps you’d already guessed that your inane, snide comments would never make it through moderation. You may be one person making multiple attempts to comment, or you may be many people sending similar messages of juvenile name-calling and attempted insults. You may be truly functionally illiterate, or you may be attempting to disguise your true identity by pretending to be.

While there are obviously many things I do not know about you, I can discern enough from your now-deleted comments to make a number of educated guesses about you and your motivations.

You hate my partner Dirt, and therefore you also hate me. You delude yourself into thinking you are happy, but underneath your brittle bravado, you are empty, lost, and sad. You feel that anyone who even questions your strongly-held beliefs is inherently evil and therefore must be intimidated, punished, and silenced. You mistake critical thinking and genuine concern for “hate speech”.

And, you are under the very mistaken impression that you can hurt my feelings, silence me, or scare me.

You, and those like you, think that if you can just silence all dissension, pass myriad laws, and strong-arm everyone into accepting the impossible, then finally you will feel validated, complete, real.

But you won’t.

Because it is all just a house of cards, bound to be toppled eventually by reality.

You can call me a c*nt and a bitch and tell me that I am stupid and guilty (or “guiltie” as you spelled it in one comment), but spewing all the venom in the world still won’t change reality.

Here’s the thing with life: Wherever you go, there you are.

You likely already know this on some level.  Every time others don’t see you as you want to be seen, a part of you knows why. Every time your body tries to fight it’s way back to normal, despite the repeated damage you are doing to it, a part of you knows why.  And that “why” is because, deep down, you are still the same person you were when you made the unfortunate and illogical decision to try to “become your true self” by changing everything true about yourself.

People who are truly balanced and content do not need to make trolling comments. People who are genuinely happy with their life decisions are too busy actually living their lives.

So, next time you decide to make disparaging comments to me (or, for that matter, to anyone else), you really need to realize that your comments always say a lot more about you than they do about the intended recipient.

When the bottom drops out, and it will, you will see that Dirt was right all along.  If you need help, let us know and we will try to help you pick up the pieces.

Until then, if you ever want to actually have a coherent, respectful, intelligent discussion, please let me know.

Otherwise, don’t even bother leaving comments like your recent ones, because not only will they never be published, you are only making yourself look pitiful.

Sincerely,

Mrs. Dirt

15 thoughts on “What Comments Reveal

  1. Firstly, forgive me if I have your position wrong, but are you against transgenderism? That’s the impression I gathered from your post but I want to be sure before I frame any arguments.

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    • Thanks for your comment and politeness so far. I do have some very grave concerns over the transgender trend, but, to be clear, I am not “against” any person. Critical thinking and questioning any ideology do NOT equal hate or a “phobia”, as it is so often incorrectly assumed.

      Liked by 2 people

      • I know what it’s like to get into angry discussion online – ultimately it achieves nothing and begets more anger. Trolls thrive on it – I’d rather characterise myself differently.

        I’m guessing from your blog that you are in a happy relationship with another woman – I would imagine that as both a feminist and a lesbian you have encountered some horrific prejudice and blockading of your rights (probably on religious grounds, or at least bigotry clothed in religion).
        I want to point out at this time stage that I don’t see why it’s anyone’s business other than yours who you are involved with, and what two consenting adults do is no concern to anyone else.

        Coming back to the issue of prejudice, it’s been my observation that certain elements of radical feminism have been all-too vocal in their condemnation of transgender individuals – particularly men transitioning into women. I find this opposition (usually based on biological grounds – men are all violent, men are all rapists etc) is quite passionate and also quite close-minded.

        Please note, this is not directed at you.

        The biological argument cuts both ways and sets a dangerous precedent. If men are genetically predisposed to be aggressive, should blanket statements about women being submissive and weak be considered okay?

        In the wider context of transgender individuals, are we to assume that biology alone determines who they are as a person?

        The biological argument can also be wielded against same-sex individuals. From a purely biological perspective, it can be argued to be a mistake – an evolutionary dead end. This is a position popular with the conservative religious right. ‘It is unnatural’, they proclaim.

        This unholy alliance between radical feminists and the conservative religious right (which is steeped in patriarchal thinking) baffles me.

        I’ve written a slightly more in-depth look into this, here: http://meerkatmusings.co.uk/terfs/

        Liked by 1 person

        • Hi again darthtimon: Thanks for your commentary and for your civility. I appreciate the ability to have a polite discussion.

          The whole transgender topic is very complex, and difficult to boil down to a single post/comment, but I would like to just to touch on a couple points you made in your comment and also in the link you sent:

          1). TERF is actually an anti-feminist slur directed at women to dismiss what women have to say, so the term itself is dismissive and offensive. Plus, I am a feminist, but radical feminism (the “RF” in TERF) is notorious for misunderstanding and misrepresenting Butch/Femme relationships, so I do not agree with some of those radfem tenets anyway, but that is an entirely different topic which is unrelated to the points we are discussing. The point is, TERF is an inappropriate term in general, and everybody who questions the trans narrative is not a radical feminist anyway.

          2). While feminists and conservatives may appear on the surface to agree on the transgender issue, the reasons for the questioning of trans ideology are very different between the 2 groups, so it is not really a true “alliance” like people seem to think it is.

          3). The whole idea that “boys like blue” and “girls like pink” (and other such stereotypes) is indeed what led to to the transgender ideology. The simple fact is that preferences in toys, clothes, friends, hobbies, interests, etc. do not determine whether someone is a boy or a girl. Biology does. People aren’t “assigned at birth” as it is nonsensically said now ~ they are born a boy or girl biologically, period. (Of course, there are rarely also intersex people, but that is unrelated to this topic).

          4). Expanding on #3: if, let’s say, a girl likes blue and is good in sports and does not want to wear dresses, it does NOT mean she is “really a boy”, it simply means she is still a girl ~ a girl who likes blue and sports and pants. It does NOT mean she was “born in the wrong body”; it does NOT mean she needs hormones and surgeries. Again, she is always a girl and always be a girl, regardless of how she cuts her hair or what she wears or who she dates or any other factors.

          5). Transgender ideology, despite claims to be subversive and to be pushing the gender envelope, etc., is actually quite regressive; the very assumption that there is a “correct” way for girls or boys to be is actually retro to the max. If people really want to push boundaries, here’s an idea: why don’t we let people wear what they want, do what they want, and express themselves in whatever way they want without diagnosing them and/or using dangerous hormones and surgeries to try to change them? If a boy wants to wear a tutu, why not? If a girl wants to play with a GI Joe, why not? To say they are the opposite sex because they like certain things is assuming that there is a “right” way to be a boy and a “right” way to be a girl and any deviation is diagnosable. In other words, I am arguing that they are perfectly fine as they are and the goal of therapy , if needed, should be to help each person accept himself/herself unconditionally, NOT to attempt to change everything about a person.

          6). Because of these repressive stereotypes of the “right” way or “wrong” way to be a boy or girl, a lot of the children/adolescents who are being targeted for transition would have grown up to be perfectly healthy gay men or lesbians. So the “LGBT community” isn’t really a community at all when it targets it’s own for dangerous medical procedures.

          7). So the biological argument that you mention is not the same biological argument I am discussing. The biological argument I am discussing here is simple: a baby is born a boy or a girl and no amount of hormones or surgeries will ever change their DNA. Note that I am NOT suggesting that women are predisposed to being “weak and submissive” etc. ~ that is a different “biological” argument altogether.

          Well, I think that covers a few of the points; and again, this topic is complex so it is impossible to discuss fully in a brief reply.

          Again, I appreciate your politeness and thanks again for taking the time to comment. 🙂

          Liked by 2 people

        • Good evening (or morning, depending on where in the world you’re from!) Saye. I meant to reply sooner but got wrapped up in a couple of things.

          I will admit up front that I don’t possess the tools right now to properly digest what you have to say and therefore can’t offer up a response. My gut feeling is that I disagree with some of what you say, but I can’t pin it down in my own mind, so won’t waste your time blundering through a reply. I might do so at some stage, when I’m not feeling exhausted!

          Liked by 1 person

  2. @ darthtimon

    I fail to see what biology has to do with trolling.

    Regarding biology and transgenderism in general , no human or animal is comes out of its mother’s vagina shooting up poisonous amounts of hormones not intended for its body or surgically mutilated body parts deems sexual via male power systems. Homosexuality and Heterosexuality are biological which is proven EVERY time one or the other transitions-biology doesnt change including sexuality, it merely appears distorted.

    Regarding RadFeminism-it/they despise the kind of lesbians my wife and I are-born lesbians-which are the ONLY lesbians! RadFems and Transgender are 2 sides of the same coin-transgender agendists should thank RadFems for bringing transgender into the gay and lesbian community and thereby into popular general culture where they are now reaping unprecedented special rights. RadFems ran with pedophile John Money’s gender identity theory because they believed it was proof that behaviour was taught rather than organic and RadFems and Transgenders alike continue to run with that theory despite it having been proven false shortly after it was theorized. The psychiatric community held on to the theory in effort to eradicate homosexuality and autogynephilia in theory via appearance. Its obvious today how hated homosexuals are when the president of the US himself has passed into laws that are murdering homosexual children as soon as we are believed to be recognized as such in federal school systems.

    Due to my wife’s and my IQ-religion period baffles us-least of all those daft enough to believe in kindergarten magical thinking. But there is now FlowersForAlgernon drug to transition religious believing dunderhead’s into intelligent people.

    dirt

    Liked by 2 people

  3. The love of my life has(d) two transmale *friends when we met. To be honest, the thought of her being so close with them and using feminine pronouns bothered me. a lot. She was quite naive and took them at their word that they had rid themselves of their junk. Yeah right, the numbers do not side with that, and with these bathroom bills popping up all over the place, they don’t even need hormones let alone surgery, one just needs to feel like a woman, or a man.

    Anyway, she swore when I met *her *HIM, I would see that they pass. She had one of them pick us up at the airport, she says “Just look for a woman.” Well, needless to say, I could see this person a mile away and said so. “Here comes your friend.” He walked like a sailor and forgot to shave. To me, HE is not really trying to pass is he?

    He must have known I was skeptical, he rarely communicated with my honey and when he did, he called me a “TERF.” My babe had no idea what that was an acronym for.
    Have subsequently turned her on to this blog and another one dealing with specifically transmales. Her mind is now open.

    I feel a tad guilty she no longer communicates with these two people, but I just pointed out the obvious. There has been communication between them I will not share here, but suffice it to say, they know I know what is going on, they feel threatened by me because my honey catered to their delusions. I will not.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Hi Chonky, Thanks for commenting! People are expected to not see or state the obvious, and if we dare to question or critically think about this dangerous trend, we are accused of being bigots or “transphobic” ~ which is a misnomer. I believe the truth will win in the end, but sadly, not before many people have been harmed.

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      • Thank YOU Saye and Dirt for having your blogs. Females by nature tend to be more patient and easy going and women like my girlfriend just wants to believe in what is told to them, they tend to shy from confrontation and acrimony. Hence, a big reason why males can walk all over them. In heels and out.

        I do have a question for you.

        On a political site of which I am a member, someone posted photos of trans females that really could pass. Buck Angel being one. The others had six-packs, the ubiquitous facial hair and had a mans physique, no shapely give-away hips. Their post simply said this: “Would you want this person in the women’s bathroom?” As we know, females are at great risk of harm in men’s spaces. What are your thoughts on these females who can “pass”?

        Liked by 1 person

        • Hi again Chonky, I always find it interesting to see pics versus videos of FtMs like Buck Angel or Aydian Dowling. Many times, when I see just a pic, it will look like they could “pass” as a man, but then when I see a video, particularly if they are in the video with actual men, I can tell they don’t really pass as well as it looked like they would in a still pic (due to size, mannerisms, voice, etc.). The question of whether it’s okay for FtMs to be in a women’s room is a moot point for me; because they are, in fact, still women, no matter how much Testosterone or how many surgeries they have had. Their DNA is and always will be female. But, of course, it should be noted that they may create a stir in the women’s room because of the effects of the T (such as facial hair, etc.).

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  6. Another reminder that if you submit argumentative, inappropriate, rude, ridiculous, and/or redundant comments, that I will not publish them.

    I will attempt to answer your questions if asked appropriately, but I will NOT “beat a dead horse” (sorry, I hate that expression!) by going over the same information endlessly.

    I will not continue to argue the same points over and over and OVER.

    There are some issues which I will NEVER back down on, and further discussion is unnecessary once we reach the point where we are going around in circles.

    My opinions are clear and are explained in my posts.

    If I ever change my mind on ANY topic, I will do a new post to let everybody know.

    This is MY blog and I will speak freely about my opinions. You are entitled to your opinions too, of course, but you are NOT entitled to have them published HERE.

    I am not here to please you. I am here to speak my truth. If you don’t like it…well, sorry, but “bye”.

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