It’s Neither Radical Nor Feminist To Hijack “Lesbian”

My sweetie Dirt wrote a post yesterday entitled “How Lesbian Became the Vehicle for Radical Feminist Anger“.  Please read her post, here, first, because this post is intended as a supplement.

Dirt’s post deals with how Radical Feminists appropriated “Lesbian” and falsely used “Lesbian” as a vehicle to express their own anger toward men/patriarchy.

Analyzing the RadFem definition of “Lesbian” (“What is a lesbian? A lesbian is the rage of all women condensed to the point of explosion.”), it should be incredibly obvious to anyone with an IQ higher than mayonnaise that the so-called “Radicalesbians” who wrote the misguided and male-obsessed treatise “The Woman Identified Woman” (and their gung-ho disciples) were/are neither Radical nor Lesbian.

These angry straight women decided, in typical straight-privileged fashion, that they were unhappy with the status-quo regarding men/patriarchy, but instead of directly and effectively taking action to actually change their relationships with men and/or to dismantle patriarchy in any systematic or useful fashion, they chose to cowardly retreat from battle, using their contrived camouflage of “Lesbian” as a way to hide from and avoid the true issues.

Under the guise of “sisterhood“, these straight women proceeded to do the least “sisterly” thing possible:  they proceeded to steamroll over real Lesbians in every way possible, and continue to do so even today.

Ironically, these same purported “Lesbian feminists” are the very same individuals who are arguing incessantly that males cannot become females simply by saying so…yet, somehow, they fail to comprehend the irony that they are doing the very same thing: claiming to be something they are not, while arrogantly expecting to be automatically believed and welcomed with open arms.

Real Lesbians were (and still are) an inconvenient truth in these faux “Lesbians’” alleged “feminism“.

We insist on pointing out the pesky truth that the prevalent myth that “any woman can be a Lesbian” is an outright lie. We point out that arguing with men all day, every day on Twitter  or elsewhere isn’t actually taking constructive action. We repeatedly point out that Lesbians are not “angry man-haters”; that being Lesbian is not a choice; and that every woman who says she is a Lesbian is not actually a Lesbian.

In short, we are raining on their parade and they don’t like it.

Here’s the thing: It is not “radical” to run from the true issues and hide behind a mask. It is not “radical” to appropriate “Lesbian” because you are too scared to stand up for your rights as a straight woman. And it’s certainly not “feminist” to harm real Lesbians with your nonsense.

So, instead of “Radical Feminist Lesbians“, a more apt title would be “Cowardly Straight Females”.

What would be truly “radical” for these straight females to do would be to constructively find ways to gain and maintain power in their heterosexual relationships and to actually address societal inequities in a methodical and effective fashion.

These faux “Lesbian feminists” can unfollow or block Dirt and me; they can call us “scary” or “dangerous” or “bullies” or “mind-controllers” or any other name; they can attempt to discredit us; and they can continue proclaiming to the top of their lungs that all it takes to be a Lesbian is to simply claim to be one.

But no matter how loud they scream or how vehement their protests against what Dirt and I are saying, the truth remains the same:

Wherever you go, there you are.

And for these false “Lesbian feminists“, they are still stuck in the same place they were in 1970: still arguing with/about males under the false guise of “Lesbian“.

It’s way past time to stop of being stuck that rut, don’t you think?

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Image: By Joost J. Bakker from IJmuiden CC BY 2.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0) via Wikimedia Commons

 

26 thoughts on “It’s Neither Radical Nor Feminist To Hijack “Lesbian”

  1. I don’t understand why it matters who people sleep with. Yes, I choose to be queer now. I am sick of domineering and abusive men. I want someone who will love me and be nice to me. Who are you to say I can’t have that?

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    • QueerFemmy:

      First, Queer does NOT mean Lesbian; in fact, it’s a huge tip-off that you are not one.

      It doesn’t matter to me who you sleep with; but it matters greatly if you are not honest with your Lesbian partner(s) about what your true orientation is (straight).

      Furthermore, being Lesbian is NOT all about sex, and it’s offensive to equate our lives with an overtly sexual connotation like “I don’t understand why it matters who people sleep with”.

      Most importantly, it is sad that you are sick of men since that is who you are actually attracted to, but let me be clear:

      Lesbians are NOT your consolation prize.

      Liked by 4 people

    • QF: Nobody’s saying you *can’t* have that, but I am saying you *shouldn’t*. You admit that it is a choice for you. You clearly are heterosexual. Grow the fuck up and stop acting like lesbians are your flunkies.

      Liked by 2 people

  2. I’m a newcomer in yours and your wife’s blogs, so I was shocked after reading what Dirt wrote about radical feminists. I’m one of them, but I’m straight and I have say that from the very beginning. After reading more posts of Dirt in how some straight women hijacked the lesbian movement for any kind of gain and profit, I understood everything better. Yes, it’s sad and I understand your anger. I move in some radfem groups and often comes this topic of straight radfem women going into lesbianism, which I deeply disagree, that is cheating. If somebody really isn’t lesbian or bisexual, it has no sense and the only thing that will come out from that is suffering for the lesbian part of the relationship.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Hi Karen, and thanks so much for your comment. It’s good to know that you (and hopefully others) do/will understand where we are coming from and why we are saying what we are. We don’t have any problem with straight feminists who say they are straight (or celibate, if they want to separate from men); instead, it’s just the ones hijacking and defining lesbian who we are concerned about.

      Liked by 2 people

  3. I have long argued that the real solution to the problem of “political lesbianism” is calculated political celibacy. Per my religious affiliation, it is actually my specialty. I think I will write a post in reply to yours and Dirt’s that discusses the role straight women play in reforming heteropatriarchy.

    Liked by 2 people

    • I’d be interested to read that too. I don’t know whether this still goes on, but in the 1980s it was not uncommon for celibate (heterosexually oriented) feminists to describe themselves as “non-practising lesbians”, as though rejecting sex with men and political commitment to women as a class were sufficient to earn them the appellation “lesbian”.

      Liked by 1 person

      • Interesting! I don’t have a problem with them using celibacy as a “substitute” for heterosexuality, but in that case, it seems the more accurate term would be “non-practicing straight”. 😀

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        • Of course! I wrote exactly that in my comment, then deleted it because I thought I was stating the obvious. But you have to remember that these people are by and large fundamentalist social-constructivists, and the stronger their heterosexual desire, the more they regard it as evidence of how they, along with all of us, have been manipulated/perverted/indoctrinated by patriarchy.

          Given that they view “lesbianism” as a state to be aspired to, we might think that they would hold those of you (now and historically) who are/were lesbians “anyway”, despite all the vicissitudes that brings, in high regard and respect. How wrong we would be!

          Liked by 1 person

  4. There is no substitution for Lesbians.

    I appreciate that bi/het women have their own particular struggles, particularly with men. It’s great for them that they bond. I don’t care what they do in the bedroom (really please spare me!)… but whatever they do, if you are straight you are not a lesbian. If you are bi you are not a lesbian… To bi and het women: Feel free to call yourself whatever fun term that fits the flavor of the week, but don’t steal from a minority that you aren’t a part of (and our respective culture/s).

    I thought this wasn’t basic feminism 101, but basic decency 101. I shouldn’t have to spell this out in order to even approach political discussion again with people I otherwise share a great deal of political agreement and overlap with no matter where I go. If I had a dollar for every time I encountered a “just for lesbians group” that was filled with bi/het women admitting they weren’t actual lesbians I’d be able to pay off a sizable chunk of my student loans.

    If they won’t even listen to lesbians (After all we are exactly like them right? No! Wrong. I was born this way not because it’s a disease, but because this is who I really am. If you are too you are a lesbian too, you can ditch the “political” and het worship to snub it to the patriarchy. You don’t need an excuse to be yourself if you are a lesbian!)… I feel worst I think for the lesbians who seem misguided on the whole thing and just want to support other women but end up hurting other lesbians instead by encouraging and allowing this shit to go on. 😦

    Thank you Saye for always fighting for us. I feel like as a younger lesbian I often have trouble running into other lesbians who have been around this shit longer who aren’t yet 100% burnt out and no longer able to fight it. It might not seem like much (I don’t know how you perceive your own blogging of course)- but we younger lesbians appreciate it.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thanks so very much! 🌺Sometimes it does feel stressful and frustrating to keep speaking up & encountering so much opposition, so your comment is much appreciated! I agree with all you said and it is nice to know others see what is happening. 🌸

      Like

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