Straightbian “Logic” 101

Straightbian “Logic” 101:

“Hi! I am a lesbian. Huh? Well, I know I am a lesbian because I LOVE and support womyn! Sending solidarity to my feminist sisters worldwide! I choose to center womyn in my life! And look: Here’s a dream catcher! Also, look at this pic of me kissing my girlfriend. And she’s not the only woman I’ve kissed either! Because I love p***y! Yummy yum yum yum! Could eat it all day! And here’s another pic of me at Michfest, and I am not even wearing a bra! Ha! That proves it! Look at my hairy legs, for the love of goddess! Womyn-born-womyn space is needed & TERF is a slur! Damn it, TERF is a slur! Mary Daly rocks! So does Kate Millett. Also, I once met Rita Mae Brown at a book signing. Plus, I have been no-platformed at least twice. I’ll have you know that I fight The Patriarchy every single day, and it’s hard saying ‘no’ to The Patriarchy! I had to have sex with multiple men before I finally figured out how to say ‘no’ to their perverted male needs! Oh, yeah, and #metoo and #yesallmen! I haven’t slept with a man since at least January, FFS! What is wrong with you? Why don’t you believe me? You **should** support all womyn! If I say I am a lesbian, that’s all you need to know! It’s my identity, not yours! You’re harassing lesbians! It’s harassment and bullying to not agree with me and to not fully support my identity as a lesbian! It’s up to every woman to choose her own sexuality! There’s no such thing as born-that-way, I can make whatever choice I want! Haven’t you heard of #BelieveAllWomen? Who are you to say what a lesbian is anyway?? You’re a man, aren’t you? Yes! You’re an infiltrator! Yes, I see it all very clearly now. Look at your picture, you do look kinda mannish there. Look at those biceps. You’re a TiM! I am going to tell everybody you’re a TiM! I am going to get you banned from Twitter! You are a misogynist chauvinist pig MRA! Waaaaaaaaaaaa! #DirtandMrsDirtSuckAFatOne

UnStraightening Lesbian: Removing The Heterosexual Lens: Rita Mae Brown

NOTE: This is the latest in the UnStraightening Lesbian series, originally posted on Dirt’s blog, at this link.

We begin our next set of unSTRAIGHTening Lesbians with the Sneaky Pie Lavender Menace to Lesbians herself Rita Mae Brown. If not familiar with Rita Mae, she was an early element in the Radical Feminist movement after she was more or less removed from Betty Friedan‘s National Organization of Women (NOW). The purported reason Rita Mae was ousted was because she claimed at the time to be a Lesbian. Through this ousting Rita Mae and other Lesbians STRAIGHTBIANS formed the RadFem group Lavender Menace.

But it wasn’t Rita Mae’s libber angst that cloaked her in Lesbianism, it was her first novel Rubyfruit Jungle:

For making the primary point of these posts, (unSTRAIGHTening Lesbian) one really doesn’t have to look beyond Rubyfruit Jungle. The novel rapidly begins with prime character Molly STRAIGHT away focusing on DICK…no, not as in another character…but rather as in a boy the young Molly exploits for profit using his uncircumcised penis in a show and tell: (Ah penis, something every young Dyke wants to see—nope, think again honey!):

From there the novel speeds to Molly having sex with a straight female friend AND then later her straight male cousin Leroy:

A sexual relationship young Molly repeats throughout her cohabitation with cousin Leroy/his family:

Molly struggles to outgrow her illegitimate hick background which both deeply troubles/embarrasses her by heading as soon as she can to the big city; New York. Once there we encounter Molly’s first time at a gay bar with a gay male friend:

It is clear from this moment that it isn’t just the character of Molly who knows nothing about Butch or Femme Lesbians, it is Rita Mae herself who is ignorant for even posing this question at all.

Rita Mae uses her novel to slam other STRAIGHTBIANS dominating the “lesbian” bar scene: damaged Het women who could only see relationships through their own Heterosexual nature: male or female. Mo was no more a Butch than Molly; everything to them, INCLUDING Lesbian, depended solely on what they claimed to be, not what they actually were.

Rita Mae’s snobbish STRAIGHTBIAN Molly places her own warped version of Lesbian (two attractive society approved straight women having sexual relations) above that of fat ugly STRAIGHTBIANS who portray/participate in Heterosexual mimicry.

Moving on:

Rita Mae’s Molly is so disgusted by the purported lesbians she encounters at the bar she jokingly would rather encounter a rapist than entertain the notion of sex with the bar lezzies“! 

Molly apparently thinks herself miles and morals above most, even while she is fucking a small family; mother, father and underage daughter (Thank God they didn’t have any pets!):

Given Molly’s Hetero MALE mimicry (forcing herself on a woman/believing that the woman’s no equals yes) there was no surprise why Betty Friedan could no longer find a place for Rita Mae’s Radical Feminism!

Polina turns the table on Molly and entices her to role play a game Polina and her husband play involving public urinal sex (ewwww):

Molly then moves on to a date with Polina’s husband, Molly figures by fucking Paul she can be closer to Polina, does that sound like any Lesbians you know? No? Me neither!

Molly then moves on to Polina and Paul’s underage (!?!?!?!) daughter:

The dialogue for Alice wanting to have sex with her mother sounds eerily familiar, and Rita Mae’s treatment of incest as “untraumatic” is the ONLY thing “antihuman” here! 

Molly says earlier in the novel of a similar fuckfest:

Rubyfruit Jungle sums up everything that is Lesbian about Rita Mae and Lesbian in the novel: NOTHING!

That didn’t stop Rita Mae from giving advice to young suicidal Gays and Lesbians in her intro to:


Homosexuals who aren’t “successful gay people” like Rita Mae, (successful meaning Homosexuals who are Heterosexuals who use Homosexuality for their own perverse uses) dress odd, have “exaggerated mannerisms” and are apparently akin to hookers!

Rita Mae, like Molly from Rubyfruit Jungle, sees Homosexuals and/or STRAIGHTBIANS who are found in gay bars as warped, alcoholics, and obsessed with their Homosexuality (or in the case of STRAIGHTBIANS, obsessed with their claim of Homosexuality).

These people, Rita Mae tells young Gays and Lesbians, are life’s LOSERS!

Rita Mae blatantly states actual Homosexuals can simply cast off our inherent natures and be like her (a pro-incest, polygamous, bisexual)!

Rita Mae Brown, by her own admission (when convenient) cast off calling herself a Lesbian, not just because she wasn’t (and she clearly isn’t!!), but because it was no longer profitable to her now mainstream Heterosexual female audience. Rita Mae hated and still hates labels:

Being a Lesbian isn’t constricting or freeing and it mostly certainly isn’t a sarcophagus burying us alive! Like many STRAIGHTBIANS, Rita Mae donned “Lesbian” like cross dressers don woman, Lesbian for Rita functioned as fetish, financial gain, and fame.

dirt and Mrs. Dirt

Well, That’s Queer

Every time I hear or see the word “Queer”, I involuntarily flinch. This word has become one of the banes of Lesbian existence, as it is used as a catch-all term to denote pretty much every Special Snowflake from here to San Francisco. Well, mainly San Francisco, but geography is irrelevant to my point. My point is, the use of the word “queer” has come to mean anything from any random individual with more piercings than common sense to the pro-pedophile freak Pat(rick) Califia.

As I have said before, Lesbian is not “Queer” and “Queer” is not Lesbian, and never the twain shall meet.

I remember hearing “We’re here, we’re queer, get used to it!” being shouted in Pride marches of yore. I didn’t mind the word then, because “queer” was being used to reclaim a slur that had been used against us. Quite simply, “queer” didn’t mean what it does now…and in that context, it certainly wasn’t being used to erase Lesbian reality in that context as the “queers” of today are seeking to do.

As my readers know, Dirt and I are quite outspoken about our thoughts and feelings on the on-going bastardization of the meaning of the word Lesbian. We are also very outspoken on the fact that there is no LGBTTQQIAAP+++ community.

So, you can imagine my surprise when I was asked to read/review a book called “Hashtag Queer: Lgbtq+ Creative Anthology (Book 1)“. In fact, I hesitated before accepting, because, believe it or not, I actually don’t enjoy controversy, arguments, and/or negativity.  I truly WISH we all were one big happy community frolicking hither and yon in peaceful harmony.  However, as much as I may wish for harmony and community, the stark fact is: reality always trumps feel-good naivete.

So I held my breath when downloading the copy they sent me, even feeling a little queasy with anxiety. However, despite my apprehension, I admit that I hoped that, amidst all the queer, perhaps a tad of Lesbian would peek through.

Sadly, I found most of it to be completely unrecognizable to me as a Lesbian.

Let’s just take a gander at just a couple of examples, shall we?

1). “How Jac Twist’d Turned You” by Emma Munro starts with:

“Jac Twist’d is staring and it is annoying. He is both female, femme, and Drag Kinging…”

And ends with:

“You now feel powerful in red heels and red lacquered nails, with your bosom sweetly strangled in a corset and a dildo dangling between your legs. Jac and you take the straight and bend it into shape. Any shape.”

2). “The Flip Side of Coming Out” by Eva M. Schlesinger starts with:

“I had just arrived at the coffeehouse, when I ran into an old friend. ‘What’s new?’ Kate asked. ‘I’m now partnered with a man,’ I said…I came out as a lesbian when I was nineteen…Being a lesbian made sense. I was certain a relationship with a woman would soon follow. Instead, I fell in love with a man.”

And ends with:

“I remembered running into another lesbian friend at the grocery store. She, too, had asked, ‘What’s new?’ Glancing at the cashiers, I turned back to her warm gaze. ‘I’m now partnered with a man.’ I held my breath, wondering what would happen next. I was surprised when she said, ‘I have felt that yearning myself.‘”

3). “I Like Dick” by Maddie Godfrey starts with:

“I like dick, Big dick, small dick, medium dick, I like dick that is thin and dick that is thick…”

And ends with:

“and maybe this is why I enjoy being choked during sex those gasps for air, like the feeling of drowning it almost reminds me, of her”

(To be fair, I should note that at least Maddie Godfrey states that she is a “straight-presenting bisexual” in this entry, so at least she doesn’t call her love of dick “Lesbian”. Thank goodness for small favors, huh?).

My point is: None of these entries are Lesbian. None of these entries are anything a Lesbian can even relate to.

Once again, Lesbian is hidden under the oppressive umbrella of queer.

This phenomenon is nothing new or shocking; in fact, it’s par for the proverbial course…but it is still disappointing nonetheless. I have said this before, and I will say it again, us Ls need to remove ourselves from the never-ending LGBT+++ acronym; in fact, we already are not a part of it except for our initial.

My feeling about this anthology is that it’s fine if you are interested in reading a variety of “queer” poems, essays, and stories without any expectation whatsoever of getting an accurate representation of Lesbian lives.

But if you are looking for an accurate representation of Lesbian lives through fiction, poetry, essays, or even non-fiction, I wish you luck, because a snowball has a better chance of surviving in Hell than Lesbian truth has in a queer anthology.

I’m not saying that this anthology itself was terrible; in fact, many entries were interesting, well-written, and heartfelt. They just weren’t Lesbian, which is my sole focus.

The only entry that I felt any true empathy or kinship with was “Presence and Absence” by Laury A. Egan; this was a moving poem about the mourning of the dying/death of a long-term partner. I felt that this piece was written in such a way that it is universally relatable.

In fact, a particular quote from “Presence and Absence” reminds me of how I feel about the on-going loss of Lesbian truth (although the speaker is referring to a now-deceased partner). Therefore, I think the quote is a fitting way to end this post:

“I want the nothing
that remains to become
something again
for the lost
to be found
transformed from empty air to real”